Don

Your life isn't hard.
This is something I say multiple times a day, everyday. To the point that it is annoying. If people complain about silly things I say "your life isn't hard." I get this saying quickly and quite mockingly pushed back onto when I fall into the same trap. But it is true. My life isn't hard. But, today was a hard day. My amazing cousin Don passed away early this morning. He has fought cancer like a warrior for years. I am overwhelmed in heartbreak and sadness, though I know he is in Heaven right now, with his perfect, healthy body. I hope he has his muscular calves back. I hope he is hanging out with my Grandpa Jack. He passed away 11 years ago today. I felt my Grandpas spirit all around me today. Though, I am so sad, I feel extremely comforted, loved and watched over.

This afternoon around 4, after I had heard the news, I got a call from Bronte. I nervously picked up the FaceTime call, not knowing what to say and fearing I would make things worse, not better. Bronte was all smiles and freckles. She is the prettiest 11 year old around. She asked me if I knew what today was. I said I did. She said "Today is the day my Daddy went to heaven". I burst out in tears. Bronte said "Don't cry. I'm all cried out. It's okay. He is in Heaven." The morning of her fathers passing and she was comforting me. In that moment Bronte became my hero. She is smiling and blessing everyone around her, on a truly hard day. I talked to Gavin too. He was smiling a rather gappy-toothless smile, as he tried on the obnoxiously huge Lightning McQueen hat I got for him years ago. I talked to Haydan, as she watched over baby Ali. I told her the McKeon girls would try to get married so we could make more babies for her to play with, but it looks doubtful. The Brenier kids are my heroes. To face hardships with love and faith in the Lord.

I need to remember my life isn't hard. I need to be actively enjoying each moment of my life, smiling, whatever the circumstance.

Don. I love you. I love you soooo much. I'll do everything in my power to keep your kids smiling. I promise.

xx Jac